Why Do Men Pull Away?
By Payo W Perry

There is one thing about men which confuses women perhaps more than anything else, why do men who are in secure and happy pre-marriage relationships suddenly pull away and become distant? Understandably women find this aspect of men to be unnerving and at times even insulting as it seems to fly in the face of everything they are doing on a daily basis in order to make him happy. The most important thing for women to realise is that pulling away in a relationship is inevitable for men; it is as natural as the sea coming in and out with the tides.

For some reason many need to pull away from time to time in order to feel that they are in love with their partner. By pulling away men are given the opportunity to miss their partner and to feel that they genuinely need them in order to be happy in life. Women who understand this natural process in men will give them the space they need, confident in the fact that when a man has fully extended away from her he will once again find his passion for the relationship and return with an enormous amount of energy to make it work once more. In short, he will have been reminded of his feelings for her.

If a man pulls away from you in the relationship and you chase after him or worse, punish him for doing something which he cannot help, you will only serve to prevent him from rediscovering his feelings of love for you. He will feel controlled and manipulated by you which in turn will prevent him from ever thinking about committing to you in a serious and long term relationship. This is because you will have prevented him from doing something which all men need to do in order to be happy in relationships.

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The First Step to a Healthy Relationship
By Payo W Perry

In order to create a really successful relationship the first thing to realise is that both men and women value and look for different things when it comes to being happy and fulfilled. The biggest mistake you can make is to expect the opposite sex to function in the same way that you do, when you try to understand your partner through comparing him or her to yourself you will inevitably wind up feeling confused and frustrated. In order to really understand the opposite sex you need to learn about them and except the differences which cannot be changed.

When you stop trying to convert your partner into an image of yourself which you find compatible and instead to choose to love them with complete acceptance for whom they actually are, you will have made the most important initial step for having a healthy relationship. Acceptance is a core human need and when you feel the fully accepted from another person it automatically makes you feel loved and important. It fulfils one of the biggest needs people have for happiness in a relationship and furthermore it makes them view the relationship in a more serious way. This makes them far more likely to commit to you over the long term.

If you cannot accept your partner unconditionally as they stand before you today, then you are probably not the right person for them to be in a relationship with. It is the natural right of everyone in a loving relationship to experience and feel this sense of unconditional acceptance. Doing this for your partner to motivate them into being the best they can be for you in return, inspire them to reach their full potential as a loving and committed partner.

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